REBORN

I finished my desk remodel project for my Hannah. She will be so excited to finally have a real desk in her room. I put the final coat of the polycrylic and it is drying as I speak. This sure was a learning experience and I really loved doing the work. I stressed about the quality of my work but had to settle for the fact that I'm not a pro yet so there are going to be a few imperfections. It gives it character, right? My dad stopped by yesterday before it was all the way finished and he was so enthusiastic about it and thought it was just Awesome! He loved it. My Hubby on the other hand never really shared his opinion ( other than to say what was wrong with it) other than he did not care for the decorative paper but said it was fine. My mom stopped by last night and did not really say anything much either, so when I prodded for her opinion, I said, "you don't like it, do you?" To which she wrinkled her face and said, " Why did you put that paper on it?" Hahaha...okay fine whatever, the paper was a mistake. You live and learn right? Then she mustered a, " it looks good".....yeah......right. Her face told a completely different story. But I guess that's what happens when you do something and you put it out there for people to see. They don't have to love it. But I DO.

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Oops

Well I have been non stop busy since the little girls left me. This desk remodel played a MAJOR part of that. Silly me thought I could get this "redo" finished in 2 days! My hubby said that was mighty ambitious of me, I just think it was plain old ignorance. I did not want to spend every single one of my free days working and it's exactly what I have done. I have not spent one moment doing something nice and relaxing or pampering to my body or mind. Goodness! Tomorrow is my last day of freedom and I at least wanted to watch a movie or go get a manicure ( you should see my hands)or pedicure or go buy myself something totally self indulgent. Jeez.....I have not even slept in past 6:30. I'm retarded. Well if it means anything I have at least enjoyed redoing the desk. I enjoy learning how to do things and this has definitely been a learing experience since it's the first time I've ever done this kind of work. I LIKE IT! I just wish I had had a whole week to work on it......but Hannah comes home Saturday and I wanted it to be all done and set up in her room when she got back. So, next time I'll know to allow myself more than 2 days to get it done. And next time I will know that wrapping paper is not a good idea to use for decorative touches. The paper part of the desk is a disaster! One I'm afraid that can only be remedied by ordering wall paper ( it's really thick) and praying I can get this other paper off and just redo that for another time. For now the paper will have to do( it's glued on there) with it's air bubbles and wrinkles and all. Eye yi yeye...... That bugs me, but what can I do. Here are some sneak peak pics.

The Color

The Paper and Knobs

Adventures in my own Home day 1

So life is completely different once you have kids. And you can only know what I'm talking about if you have them. Well for the rest of the week they are with their Grandmama in Pittsburg, TX and I plan to take full advantage of their time away. I cried a few tears even though I told myself not to. Oh well. Now here I am, I can blog with out guilt. I can sleep in if I want. I can pretty much do whatever the heck I want. It's amazing and something that has not happened here in my own home for a pretty long time. I've never been home before with out a kid around. I plan to take full advantage. First up..... CLEANING! I know, I know that does not sound all that glamorous but instead of paying the cleaning lady to come and do it, I will just pay myself that money and do the cleaning in peace and quiet with no kids around and then go shopping with the money I paid myself! Genius isn't it?? Well I think it is.

Update - 2.5 hours later. Note to self.

It's much easier to be on vacation outside the home with out the kiddo's than it is to be just home with out them. I've been cleaning and there are a million reminders of them and I burst out into tears. WHAT?? What's wrong with you! Really?? Get a grip! You'll see them in a few days. Now get back to cleaning and listening to your ipod with no interuptions. That is what you dream about isn't it? A day with no interruptions?? Geeze!

Running through my head

So many thoughts and not enough time to think them through. So maybe I will jot them down....or type them out. Just real quick.


Death is all around and I keep looking over my shoulder at him. Protect my family and me, LORD!

2 little girls,one just 2 weeks old, and their daddy, Lost their mommy( and wife) way too soon. I pray they all be comforted their whole life by knowing she's in Heaven. My heart aches because I know they'd rather have her here.

There is a time to rest and a time to be busy. Thank you that my time to be busy is behind me and I pray to have a restful remainder of the summer.

Sometimes I forget that not all people live like us( my family) and that what's common to me, can be so foreign to others.

Just because you volunteer and give a lot of your time to things that are bigger than you, does not mean you deserve anything in return. No Prasie, no recognition. Because if you think that you do, you're doing it for all the wrong reasons and will only make yourself bitter.

It was so important to me to be liked by people. Then I realized that I should first focus on liking people.

If you have a problem with people or with people's behavior and things they do drive you crazy or offend, or hurt your feelings...etc. Naturally you want those people to change their ways. Really that's a selfish way of thinking and all you're really saying is their behavior does not satisfy YOU. Why don't you change your own reactions to those things instead of expecting them to change. Really that's all you have control of. Yourself.

Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.
Matthew- 5:9

It's not so important to be understood. More so to understand what is important.

Still Have / Only Have

Depending on whether you are a pessimist or an optimist.....we still have / only have about 5 weeks left of summer vacation over here. If you are a pessimist then it's a bummer because that means summer vacation is half way over or if you are an optimist it's a good thing because you still have half your summer vacation left.


Regardless, it is what it is.


Lately things have been crazy for me with helping out at the new church property to prepare for our first service in the new place and with decorating for VBS which started today. All I have left of my churchly duties is planning Family Night this Friday to wrap up VBS. The theme is the Australian Outback and we will be having a Sausage Sizzle. I'll make some fruit kabobs and we will have a big jumpy thing and snow cones and lemonade and if all goes well it will be a grand ol time. Then I will undecorate the place and I am DUNZO! I can go back to enjoying my lazy summer days with my girls and I can give my husband back his days off from work instead of dragging him along and helping me out with everything. He's been such a trooper! Amazing really. I don't know what I would do with out my handy husband. Did I tell yall he built me a little contraption for VBS decor to add to the snack room rotation. Yeah.....he's pretty much awesome and got a few job offers. Little do they know he only does these kinds of things for me for extra kisses and I'm sure he will completely hate that I just said that.

: )

Up next -
Grandmama coming to town this weekend and then taking the girls home with her for a few day. OH MY! That means I have 4 days all to myself to do whatever I want. Kind of makes me sick to my stomach and happy all at the same time. I think I will finally redo that desk I have been dreaming about and depending on how smoothly that goes....I might work on that old dresser that has been sitting in our garage for over a year. We'll see. Then we have our beach trip to look forward too as well! Can't wait.

My Sisters Keeper

Don't worry I don't give any of the story away......


So I read the book My Sister's Keeper over the span of about 5 days. I was not really even sure I wanted to read it but I knew the movie was coming out and I figured I might as well since my mom had the book and books are usually better than the movie. As soon as I started reading it, I wanted to hurry up and finish it. And I don't mean that in a good way. I don't know if it was the style of the writing, or that I read it even though I usually don't like fiction or that it was not something written by C.S Lewis but I was just completely bored. I forced my self to finish it though because I guess I can't just stop something that I started. I have to go full circle. For some reason though I just never really connected to the book or the characters, even though at times the story was very grabbing. I can think of maybe 4 or 5 scenes in the book that were really really good. Other wise the writer fell short for me. I like books whose words come alive and who phrase things so beautifully that it's like reading art. I mean I could still envision what I was reading in my head but they already had faces and to me that took away from it a bit. Most of the time, I was just longing to get to the end so I could know what happens and be done with it. Maybe it was too many story lines going on at once when she could have had a more narrow focus to really make an impact with that story. Don't get me wrong.....I shed some tears but for what that story was, I should have been sobbing. I don't know.....I'm no writer and I am definitely no literary critic either. I'm just a stay at home mom, whom some think rank at the lowest end of the totem pole, who thought it looked like a good movie and possibly a better book but, I was wrong. I don't feel any better or like I improved myself for having read it and so to me it just seems like a waste of time. I wonder if this time the movie might be better.