The Heart of the Matter

So last night Gary and I had to take a parenting class at Hannah's school. It's one of the requirements of the school, every parent must take a minimum of 3 hours training through out the school year. It's really refreshing to me to have Hannah in a school that really cares about her and about us as well. Anyway, that's not the point of this blog but since I have seen both public and private education, I can really see the difference that sending your child to a private school makes. It's completely worth the financial sacrifice.
Let me say I was blown away by this class. The class was called Shepherding a Child's Heart. I realized that the way Gary and I have been parenting is not exactly how we should be. I know as parents we like to think how we do things is the right way and we "expect" our kids to follow our lead. But we have been going about some things in the wrong manner . As far as teaching good behavior goes we have only been trying to fix hannah's bad behavior as opposed to fixing her heart. For what is in our hearts directs how we will behave. I never thought of it like that before. I always just tried to fix the bad behavior. For example......Sharing. When Hannah and Bella are fighting over a certain toy and both want it they both are going to plead their case for why "they" should have it. It's completely a selfish thing. So typically what I would say is. Well, "who had it first?" That seems like the logical way to solve the problem, right? Okay so ..."Bella you had it first...then you should be able to keep playing with it....Hannah let it go"!What did that really teach them? Well the bible does not really teach that whomever has something first, has the right to it. No, the bible teaches to love each other as you love your self so when it comes down to sharing...if you love your sister like you love yourself, sharing will not be an issue. You will want her to have it out of the love you have for her. So what we should be teaching in that instance is not who had it first, we teach to the heart of the matter, that letting the other have it would be the right thing to do. That's some hard stuff! But it just made so much sense to me. Literally something in my heart and in my brain connected and I was like.....WOW! I have been neglecting the heart issues and just teaching my child to listen to what I say because I said so, with out teaching what the core issue is and instilling good principles in my child's heart. I want my children to learn to make good choices. For themselves. Not just so that they don't get in trouble, but because they want to do what is right. Most children will do what they are told to avoid a negative consequence or to gain a reward. But is that really teaching them to do the right thing, simply for the sake of doing the right thing? I don't think so. I know Gary and I are guilty of trying to get Bella and Hannah to behave certain ways by offering rewards for that good behavior. Basically through Manipulation. I see now that, that method is all wrong. Instead we should be teaching to the heart of the matter. It's like us as adults and how we relate to our Father. God tells us what is right and what is wrong. It's up to us to make the right choice. But we don't do it because GOD says we will be rewarded and if we do, then we are doing it for the wrong reasons. We should be doing it because we desire to do what is right. Not for the reward. So that is exactly how we should be teaching our kids. I don't want to have to manipulate them into good behavior. I want it to come from their hearts. I want to confidently send my child out into the world knowing I've equipped her with knowing how to make good choices and not feeling like she will only behave when she has to or when she thinks no one is looking.

Here are a couple good verses.

Proverbs 4:23 - 23 Keep your heart with all diligence, For out of it [spring] the issues of life

Proverbs 22:15 - Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of discipline will remove it far from him.

I have read many parenting books, even other Christian ones dealing with behavior and how to "FIX" bad/negative behavior and I did learn a lot from them but not like I did from this. How we act, all of us, our behavior comes from the heart. So to "correct" in us and in our children first has to come from fixing what's in the heart. At the end of the day, isn't that what GOD looks at anyway? We have to get down to the heart of the matter.

Infomercials

So recently I totally fell for an infomercial. It was for this makeup line called Sheer Cover. I was just amazed watching the ladies on the commercial use this product and it looked like it really worked. They were offering a special where you actually can get 2 of the products for the price of 1 and they would throw in all this other stuff. Make up and skin products are my weakness! So like I said I completely fell for it and for the first time ever ordered something off tv. I was sooo excited when it came last Saturday and could not wait to use all the neat products I got. Well let me just say I was completely disappointed. Not only did the make up NOT do what it said it would do, I felt like the products actually made my skin look dry and flaky. Humph! It just made me wonder if anyone else has been dumb enough to fall for an infomercial or am I the only goofy one?

Eddie V's

Our date night ended up being extremely nice. The entire time was so calm and peaceful and sweet. It's amazing what a difference it makes to not have 2 crazy kids around. Eddie V's!!!!!!!!!! Oh my goodness, if you have not had the pleasure of dining there, I HIGHLY recommend it. It was one of the most amazing meals we have ever eaten. From appetizer to dessert was pure savory bliss. To start we had crab cakes and this is one of our favorite things to eat and theirs did not disappoint. Yummy. Gary had filet mignon and it literally melted in your mouth. All the different flavors danced in harmony to form the most perfect taste. I'm telling you it was something else. My salmon, while not quite as flavorful as his, was equally satisfying. We had this macaroni side dish, which was the most delicious macaroni I have ever tasted. Seriously....it was ridiculously good. Then we had this amazing dessert which was this bread pudding soufle type thing. It was covered with this merengue and bourbon sweet sauce. Sinfully good. This whole meal was. So basically it was a very fulfilling dinner. One of the nicest things was that we got to take our time and enjoy the meal and just enjoy eachothers company and converse with out interuptions and focus on eachother and eachother only. It was the most perfect time!

Oh and Bella did very well for her first night away from us. She only cried a couple of times for me but grandmama was able to console her. So Gary and I are planning our next getaway soon. Maybe next time I will feel comfortable to actually leave the city.
: )

Mumbo Jumbo

I need a new hairstyle. I've had the same style for the past 15 years!!!! It has varied in length only ever so slightly. I would like short hair. Gary says no way, he likes it long......hmmm.

How likely is it for a plane/helicopter to crash into my house? This is a constant fear. That and Tornadoes. I could not sleep last night because I kept thinking with all that rain, thunder and lightning that there would be a tornado and the roof would get ripped off the house and we would all get badly injured. Last night was long. Oh and Nuclear War. This has been a big fear of mine since I was a child. We would be completely unprepared for a nuclear war, should one happen. This I worry about constantly. I need to make one of those survival kits.

I'm not one to complain too much about prices for things. It is what it is. BUT I did see that gas was 332/gallon today and that was at Wal-Mart. Oh and I saw a reserved parking spot there too for GREEN cars only. So now you get the VIP treatment at walmart if your car is Eco friendly.

Which brings me to this Global Warming. Do you buy into that? I'm not convinced and kind of think it's a sham. I know that is not a popular stance but I've never been one to believe in things just because it is a popular belief. I don't think Humans can ever be experts on the weather. To me it's all cyclical and we may go through periods of warming and then periods of cooling. Isn't it arrogant to think we "know" about the climate. Maybe I'm ignorant. Should we do all we can to take care of the environment? Absolutely. I just don't buy into the whole man made global warming rhetoric.

This week I almost electrocuted myself. I thought I would be nice and help Gary trim the bushes around the front door. I was not having so much luck whacking at the overgrown limbs with a saw so I decided to use his hedge trimmer. I was having so much fun with it....now I see why me like their tools, but while using it I accidentally cut the extension cord and it made this loud POP noise and then the trimmer just died. It took me a second to realize what I had done but once I did, I sure was scared. This was not good......and I was so dreading telling Gary because he told me NOT to use the hedge trimmer....something about it being dangerous, and he would take care of it when he got home, but I was like, " come on, how hard can it be" and then this has to happen. I gained a whole new appreciation for men and their tools. I kind of felt like Ralphie from A Christmas Carol.

Hannah has been home from school the past 2 days. I thought maybe she had strep throat but I took her to the Dr. and the test came back negative. Thank goodness. She just has some kind of virus going on. Her Dr. did put her on an inhaler though. She has had this wheezing in one of her lungs the past couple of months. The Dr. was hoping it would go away on it's own but it has not and she has this horrible cough. It makes me nervous though because I guess I am just a weirdo and I try to stay away from medications as much as possible. I prefer to take the more natural or herbal approach if possible. So this inhaler thing and the medicine scares me. I pray it helps and that she does not have to stay on it too long. I would hate for her to be dependent on an inhaler.

Well it was nice to sit here and veg, in front of the computer for a while. Bella is napping and Hannah is watching a movie. This has been a very tiring week and my body is feeling drained, but I'm extremely looking forward to Saturday!!!!!! I hope everybody has a nice weekend.

4 Years of Marriage

Today = 4years of marriage. Crazy how time flies and at the same time can seem like forever ago. Gary and I have a wonderful life together and I thank God for these last 4 years. We get to celebrate our anniversary this weekend. We decided to stay the night down town and have dinner down there and take advantage of this wonderful city that we never get to venture in. So while it may not be a jet set to Paris or anything fancy like that, I am so thrilled to spend an entire evening with my husband in pure simplicity. I get to get all dressed up in my brand new dress! No kids, no distractions, no cleaning up, or giving baths etc, etc, etc. Just eachother. What more could a girl ask for?

Lifehouse "Everything" skit

This is a bit long, but good. Thanks Michelle for sharing it, and asking me 85 times if I watched it yet. You're the best. Click on the title to see. I have not figured out how to post videos yet.

Update

Well I discovered this is a "RAT" snake. Fitting huh? Considering we also seem to have lots of rats roaming the hood. They are also commonly referred to as Chicken Snakes. They can reach up to 6 feet long and are one of the biggest snakes found in Tx. They are quite aggressive when they feel threatened and will strike at you, but they are not venomous snakes. They make their homes anywhere there are plenty of rats to be found. They also are commonly used to take care of rat problems and can be placed in attics for this reason. Why didn't we think of that? They also commonly hang out in large trees. So I guess our house is the perfect place for one of these snakes to dwell. NICE!
This is the best part. Gary, is not concerned at all with trying to keep the snakes out of our yard or trees and said it will be good for eating rodents. I say, ...."well what if one bites one of the girls while playing outside"? He says....."Ah..they aren't poisonous so I'm not too worried" Plus sophie will bark at it and then you will know it's there". Can you believe that?

p.s. Gary wanted me to make sure and let yall know that the RAT problem has been solved. He has successfully kept them out of our attic even though we still can hear the trying to get it at night time. They can't though. Ha. Good Job babe.....now about this snake problem.

Pictures

Hours later sophie was still barking at the skin! The wind had blown it off the bench and this was the piece I recovered. It did have a middle piece and an end piece. What's weird is you can see the head print. Ewww.....

Rats,Bugs, and Snakes.....Oh my

I'm living in the creepy crawly land of OZ. I mean I have Dorothy aka Bella living here and her ruby slippers. But instead of Lions we have Rats and instead of Tigers we have bugs and instead of Bears.....guess what we have? Snakes. I arrived home today to my mother being here and she's sweeping the leaves off my back porch (don't you just love moms....always trying to help) and she's sweeping away and sees what she thinks might be shed snake skin. She calls me outside to check it out and YES, it is shed snake skin. I shudder with disgust I tell ya. I also happen to notice that my dog is barking grand spastically but this in itself is no cause for great alarm since she barks at the wind blowing. She barks at birds, squirrels, other dogs, leaves falling. My mom says she has been barking for the last 10-15 minutes straight. That's not too uncommon. She onced barked at a beetle bug for a few hours. I go back inside and just go about my business. Seconds later she calls me out again and asks what in the world is it that Sophie is barking at because she sees something weird looking. I go back out to take a look and get as close as I can to see, because she's in wet grass with mud all over, and I realize it is more snake skin. And not just a little bit but a whole roll of it all bunched up together and this skin is huge. The snake must have literally slithered right out of its skin. It's bizarre. I also notice more skin on the pile of wood right by the fence. You know....the kind of pile of wood that would be a perfect place for a snake to hide. Aagghh.... We have a snake in our back yard! Good dog Sophie! Poor dog is trying to tell us about the snake. I will never make fun of you again for barking at the wind. Anyway now I guess we have snake's. My dad came over, but to his major disappointment, did not find anything. He was so excited he thought he was going to get to kill him a snake. He did however stretch out the skin and put them all together and figured it must be about a 5-6 foot snake and it's about as round as a baseball. Yikes...I sure do thank GOD we did not discover this serpent any other way. I mean the girls play back there all the time! I will be sure to post a picture of the skin just in case some of you out there might not believe this to be true. Hahaha....that cracks me up.

Music

So I read a blog recently that was about your all time favorite concert that you have ever been to and it had me trying to remember all the ones I have been to. I've been to too many to have 1 favorite so I don't think I could pick 1. But I have been to some interesting concerts. Including many Lalapalooza's that had many many different artists playing. Let's see if I can remember some. Note: All theses were during my dallas years so also let me say I came into my own in the early 90's so I was highly into alternative/grunge. I wish I had seen Alice in Chains and Nirvana. That's hilarious now.....
1. Pearl Jam
2. White Zombie
3. Pink Floyd
4. Lenny Kravitz w/ Blind Melon
5. Counting Crows w/ Fiona Apple
6. Billy Joel w/ Elton John
7. Violent Femmes
8. Smashing Pumpkins
9. Stone Temple Pilots
10. Metallica
11. Green Day
12. Yanni
13. Cypress Hill
14. Snoop Dog ( oh my goodness)
15. Hole
16. Ramones
17. Rage against the machine
18. Soundgarden
19. Depeche Mode ( this was a great show )
20. COC
That's all I can currently get out of memory storage.
Not to mention many many heavy/alternative ( think along the lines of Pantera, dead horse, tool, Helmet,COC ) shows along the way. Oh and my boyfriend at that time was in a heavy metal band( they wanted to be Pantera ) and played lot's of shows in the dallas area and I attended most of those. Yeah, I guess those were my rebellious years. Monica dated a heavy metal, long haired, nose pierced musician. Oh to be young again.

Today

I know we must plan for our future. I know it's irresponsible not to because we, if God willing, live to enjoy those Golden Years. Dave Ramsey surely is teaching how to do this and for that I am thankful. BUT today I am being thrown instances of death and it makes me realize that we also must live for today. I wonder what GOD has to say about this....I need to take some time and read the bible to get a better understanding but my thoughts for now are that we must also enjoy today. I just read a prayer request from a lady from church and she is asking for prayer for a little girl and her family because the little girl has brain tumors and has just been diagnosed terminal. She has 1-6 months to live. I don't know what mother can read that and not just cry out to GOD for this little girl and her family. They urged her parents to take her to Disneyland. NOW!
You know we should all do things NOW. Bella has been asking about the beach lately because she saw photos of our wedding and she claims she wants to wear beach clothes and go to the beach. We tell her maybe someday we can go ( when we can "afford" it) and it sure will be fun. Well I think that someday should be NOW not maybe someday. Because sometimes "maybe someday" never comes. We are not guaranteed tomorrow and to bring my child a day of joy of running in the sand barefoot and smiling would have to be something I absolutely can't afford to not afford.

Kory or Koryna

Litte Kory came over to play today. True to form, he wanted to put on Bella's shoes. Harmless? Hopefully. Funny? Cracks me up. Will I get in trouble? Probably.

We are not our cars

So Gary is always looking for ways to save us some money. He called me today to ask me if I thought he would be a goof if he drove a Corolla. His latest idea is to trade in his truck and take advantage of a special their dealership is about to run and lease a corolla for 3 years. Payment would be an extremely affordable $185.00 per month. Can you believe that? I did not think it was possible to have a car payment that low. This deal could really work for us ( instead of us working for our cars )since he really only uses his truck to drive to work and home. If we go anywhere as a family it's in my car. Plus this lil car gets 35 miles per gallon. Nice. It would surely save us some money every month.
Howbeit he does not WANT to drive a corolla....it's just something he would do for a few years so we can quickly Dave ramsify our life. Short term sacrifice,live like no one else, so that we can live like no one else. He is even willing to endure countless jokes about his manhood from other family members....cough,cough Joshua.
So I say.....we are not the car we drive! But I am curious to see what my hubby will do. I told him it's up to him...whatever he chooses I will support him. And I won't think he is less of a man....