Okay a few more

So after reading so many different people's 25 things, I realized mine were like skimming the top layer of a many layered cake. So I wanted to add a few more a' la Sara wingfield. So this is the 2nd layer.

1. I am a hard person to get to know. I don't feel like many people know the Real me. I don't let my guard down very easily or at all and because of this it is hard for me to form friendships. I mean, real close friendships. The person that knows me best is my husband and even he might not know ALL of me.

2. I'm not the most confident person but I have learned that my worth comes from GOD not from any other human being. This has helped me to be a little more confident and to take more chances when talking to people or in doing things.

3. It really bothers me that I never went to college and earned a degree. I realize now that it's not too late and I can pretty much do anything I set my mind to (again that confidence has come from Christ)but I'm also starting to wonder about this whole college thing. I think it's a scam and they just want to brain wash you at age 18 while you're still young and naive about the world. Yet I do see its benefit.

4. I am filled with so many ideas and I want to be the kind of person that brings those ideas to light. I don't want to just dream about doing things. I want to make them happen. I want to own my own business and I have it all planned out in my head.

5. I whole heartedly believe in the power of prayer. I try to spend a lot of my day talking to GOD. Praying to him, thanking him, praising him. It helps me keep a peace of mind. Everything I do, I try to do it in his name. When I get away from this( and it happens A LOT) I realize that's when the anxiety sets in.

6. By nature I am more on the pessimistic side. My husband truly taught me and shows me what it's like to be more of an optimist. By nature he is optimistic. I have found that together we completely balance each other out. It takes a lot of effort but more and more I'm learning how to choose to be optimistic. I may not naturally look at the bright side but it does not mean the bright side is not there. And it doesn't mean I can't or shouldn't see it. I have to choose what's not the easiest and most natural. For me, choosing to be positive , grows me more than settling for what comes easy.

7. I love out going people. I'm drawn to them immediately because they have something I so desperately want. In fact I'm drawn to people who have qualities so opposite of me. I'm so shy...it's painful. But I am getting better with that confidence thing. Again it comes down to making a choice to live "in" what comes natural or choosing to grow.

8. I don't like to share. What's mine is mine and what's my husbands is also mine. It's a great motto. Good thing my husband is a sharer even though he does not share this philosophy. Nothing bugs me more than having to give him something of mine....LIKE FOR INSTANCE MY ALLERGY MEDS. My allergy meds are like gold....go buy your own. Love you babe. I do realize that this is a horrible quality and I do work on it. I do share...I'm just saying I don't like to.


9. Even though people scare me. I like people. I like knowing about people, I like hearing about their lives, I enjoy hearing peoples struggles and how they overcome them. I LOVE SMART PEOPLE. I like people that have something to teach me or that can make me think. I like people that are not afraid to challenge me. I like people that have turned something ordinary into something extraordinary. I like people that use their talents,gifts, abilities for GOD. I love people that follow their dreams and make things happen. I like people that make themselves happy and don't rely on other people for it.

10. I'm a very independent person. I moved out of my parents home right after I graduated high school and I moved to Dallas and 100% financially supported myself. (aside from when I went through a divorce and lived with my parents for a little while which is something I really really hate about myself) I have always supported and depended on myself. I don't like asking for help or money and I don't like depending on other people for my life. One of the hardest things for me about being a stay home mom is that I don't support myself financially. Yet I understand that what I am contributing to my girls and hubby far outweighs any income I could be making. BUT I don't want anything just handed to me because I don't like the feeling of being in debt to someone or giving someone the power to control me or make me feel inadequate or to be able to use what they do for me against me.